It was after I had arrived at the lowest point in my life when I made a conscious commitment to redirect my energies toward something better. I know it was my own personal “rock bottom” because everything in my life now seems to have either led up to or stemmed from it. By that time, my mistakes were quickly outnumbering my good decisions, and sufficient emotional scars had been tattooed on my heart as a result (not to mention the harm I had caused others). I was reeling from the very weight of my conscience, which had usually been a strong enough force to keep me reeled in. The previous two years, though, had completely undone that reel. My values had gone from being extremely conservative to shameful and reckless. When I was ready to quit, I felt I faced only two options. I could either do just that, quit. Or I could make a new start. I chose the latter. My commitment to myself sounded something like this:
“I just want to be able to live with myself at the end of each day.”
To me, this meant that I would not be deceitful. I would not participate in things that I would be ashamed of should the light of day reveal them. Even if the chances of that happening were slim to none. I would own up to whatever mistakes I made along the way, and not let things “pile up.” And I would make efforts to continue to better myself. At that point, I didn't care if I ever made a significant mark on the world. I wasn't aspiring to reach the summit of the highest peak (literally or figuratively). The simplicity behind the commitment was to be one of the more effective promises I would ever make to myself. It's been over eight years since I made that promise, and it is what I come back to time and again when faced with important decisions.
Moving onto the thoughts that the title of this book elicits, I believe that while we are our words, most certainly, our actions are equally important. My husband communicated that very truth to me once, and it has stuck with me ever since. He had no use for the words I might use, but instead preferred to see actions to support those very words. He was right, I determined. So I dug in my heels and started to do what I said I would. Of course, I don't always get the “do” part right, and sometimes I'm too lazy to do more than use my words, but the message echoes in my head whenever there is friction in my life over what is said versus what is done. Quite often I can even skip the words and move straight to the actions.
So while our actions are important, I cannot ignore the weight of our words either. The impact of my words seems to vary depending on the recipient(s). For someone who doesn't know me, my words are probably taken at face value. Nothing more, nothing less. I believe this because they have nothing on which to base any alterations to that face value. Face value, of course, is subjective. Certainly our own views flavor the impressions we take from someone's words. However, if my views are of value to a person (most often the case if they know me), possibly my words would be capable of leaving a more lasting impression on them, for help or for harm.
Summarily, the words I choose to live by (such as my commitments to myself), affect the actions that I take in my life (that may be written of by another), which, when paired with the words I choose to use (speaking or writing), directly affect the future of the world as we know it. So I would suggest that we all choose our words wisely.
Sarah A.
No comments:
Post a Comment